That’s so 1986

So we haven’t really talked about my 25th high school reunion, have we?

Well. It was interesting. It felt like walking into a time warp. All of these people, most of whom I had not even thought about for many, many years, are alive and well…going about their lives. We all wake up and put one foot in front of the other, every day.

Some looked fantastic. Some looked like they’d fallen on hard times. Some seemed more wonderfully themselves, really in a great place. Some were obnoxious, in that mean drunk kind of way.

Every spouse of a classmate I talked with was awesome. Our class sure married well!

I wasn’t sure where the reunion was going to be held. I didn’t recognize the name of the restaurant, and didn’t bother looking into it. A week before, I bought a summer dress, on clearance. Not super dressy. It was white eyelet. Simple. We got to the restaurant early to meet our friends Michelle and Cris and catch up a little before the party officially got started. Inside the bar, I got the nice wine goblet you see in the photo above. It turned out, the party was outside, and very casual. At the right time, we ventured outdoors, where wine was served in plastic cups, and my glass was coveted by many. Seriously. People kept mentioning it. I felt just a smidge over dressed, but not horribly so. Of course my goblet made me extra fancy.

There was one guy who looked exactly the same, and for some reason I could not figure out who he was. Once someone told me it was like, oh, of course! There was a lot of standing around, whispering, figuring out “Who is that?” Then we’d figure it out, and go over and say hello.

Food was buffet style. Todd and I got plates and as we sat down to eat, I saw out of the corner of my eye at the next table, a woman I’d always thought of fondly point in our direction and say, Is that Michelle H?” As those at her table nodded, she said, thinking I couldn’t hear her…What’s with the dress?” 

And you know what? I had been feeling a little insecure about the dress. I mean, I loved the dress, but was the dress too much? Only one other person was wearing a dress (and she was rocking it btw).

Perhaps my fancy wine glass filled her with fury and she just had to take me out verbally? It’s difficult to say.

Anyway…her snide remark freed me of all insecurities. What was the worst thing that could happen? Someone like that, would say something like that.

So what?

Should I apologize for trying to look nice for my 25th high school reunion? I don’t think so. Got my hair highlighted too. And after two years, I’m done with Invisalign. By our 3oth, I plan on looking even better. Maybe some yoga and pilates in my future? You never know. It could happen.

Cue the inspirational music and play the Marianne Williamson quote which is always falsely attributed to Nelson Mandela:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won’t feel insecure around you….” Yada yada.

Who am I to wear a cute dress?

Who am I to have a fancy goblet? LOL.

I love that quote. And I really, really feel in my heart it is true, and if we all knew who we really were, we’d  never ever say anything hurtful about anyone else, it just wouldn’t be possible. One day we’re all gonna get there.


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12 Responses to That’s so 1986

  1. kario says:

    Oh my God, I needed this! I have just come from a family gathering where someone said something terribly hurtful about me and I needed this spin. Your release, now that the “worst” that could happen had happened. And you know it isn’t true. And so you move on. Thank you so much, Michelle!

    The quote reminded me of Deb Shucka’s post today about darkness and light. Something tells me this is my message from the Universe today. No accidents.

  2. Melly says:

    “You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world.” A new favorite quote! Thank you. You are truly a beautiful person, inside and out. So glad you know that. 🙂

  3. This post is adorable! Everyone has moments of insecurity at those reunions, I think. I know I did. I like how you decided to frame it all in the end. Perfect! Thanks for sharing.

  4. rhemashope says:

    love you!
    and it looks like you rocked that dress!
    (and of course i’m wondering if any of the people in the pictures are in your book. =})

  5. Sandi Babbitt says:

    I can’t recall how I discovered your blog, but I’m enjoying it, and I’m looking forward to finding your book!

    Ah, I enjoyed this wonderful reminder . . . be ourselves. I love the honesty of that quote. How dare us not to be who we are, and shouldn’t we all be treating each other as we’d like to be treated?

  6. My friend Michelle, in the first pic is the “Hotel California” girl in the slumber party scene. LOL.

  7. Amanda says:

    She totally wished she’d made more of an effort! You can’t help being a classy bird… 😀

  8. Dee Ready says:

    Like Sandi, I’m new to your blog, Michelle. But I do remember that I found you through my friend Jerri. The Williamson quote really hits home for all of us doesn’t it? Growing into ourselves and embracing who we all. I can’t wait to get your book. Peace

  9. Niksmom says:

    Oh, girl, I’m betting it wasn’t the dress OR the goblet that had her knickers in a twist. It was, likely, the happiness and confidence you radiate. The peace you are finding and growing daily. Because THAT, is a thing so many people don’t have and DO envy. But, you know, she would’ve sounded pretty stupid saying “And what’s with that HAPPINESS she’s sportin’??”

  10. naomi says:

    I can’t figure out why a cute, white dress wouldn’t be appropriate for a casual summer party. Maybe red sweaters in the winter suddenly a no no as well?
    You = Gorgeous.

  11. Carrie Link says:

    Lordy lou lou on people that say shit like that. Love the MW quote.

  12. amber says:

    I agree with Naomi. Just what I was thinking! It is a tad odd to think that is odd, me thinks…
    You looked beautiful.


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