Orchid “Mania”

Yesterday, the kids and I accompanied our friend Jancy to The Cleveland Botanical Gardens where Orchid Mania is presently happening.

I took a ton of pictures and made a gorgeous slide show.

Contrast the tranquility of these photos, with my extreme frustration at not being able to figure out how to upload said slide show onto the blog. Seriously it was bad. After tinkering with it last night for hours, I was dejected. There were tears. HT tried for a bit. He couldn’t figure it out either, and finally he forced me to step away from the computer and watch Modern Family to cheer me up. But I still was overwhelmed. It felt like the time in nursing school, when there was this professor, who hated adult learners, and only liked the 19 year olds she could intimidate. She took me and a couple of other older students (I was 28, they were in their forties) in the accelerated program and found ways to slice our papers to shreds. She gave me a 46 on a paper. I’d never received below a 90 on a piece of writing in my life. Of course she made her lackey assistant deliver the papers. She was a twisted woman, and I was a serious wreck, feeling like such a failure over this. (Finally another faculty member pulled me aside and was all….Look…I’ll deny I ever said this…but she is nuts, don’t take it personally, this isn’t about you. I’ll never forget her kindness).

So last night, all this negative self talk was just flying through my head. I should be able to put a slide show up on my blog. It shouldn’t be that hard. Like there is a personal deficit in me because I am not a computer whiz. I was really beating myself up.

And I know the “shoulds” are ridiculous. I know better. And I know there are a lot bigger problems in the world than whether I can get my Orchid Mania slide show up and running. Seriously, this morning? It’s laughable. But sometimes, I’m just that intense about things. And no it isn’t lost on me how my little apple of a daughter didn’t fall far from the tree.

I’ll keep trying for the pretty slide show, but it may be a few days. Mommy needs to take a break from the Orchids.

We had fun at Orchid Mania though. It was a great day yesterday, until the slide show.

At least I got a pretty new header for my efforts.

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9 Responses to Orchid “Mania”

  1. amber says:

    Oh Michelle, my dear fellow nutbar friend…I FEEL YOU. lol


  2. Jenny R says:

    These pictures are gorgeous…and scrolling down through them felt like a slideshow to me!

  3. Michelle O'Neil says:

    * So I flip open the Girls on the Run book to go over the lesson I need to teach this afternoon…and the topic?

    Negative self-talk.

  4. Camille says:

    Guess God was getting you ready and reminding you what it can do. Your talk will rock from personal experience!

  5. Amanda says:

    I have the same issue with trying to get my mobile to synch with the blue tooth on the car – and every time I get in the car it taunts me with a beep and screen saying “Accept Ford Audio?” if I say yes, the phone switches off. I don’t know what to do with it, but everytime I hear that beep I find myself telling it to “Shut UP!!”

    Love the pretty pics – must have been quite something to see in the flesh.

  6. kario says:

    I can’t help but see this post through the lens of my last blog post about fear. “What would this look like if it weren’t coming from a place of fear?” I don’t know about you, but as soon as I ask that question, I begin to see a place to stand where I see myself with love and acceptance and recognize that what I am most afraid of is not being good enough. And that’s silly. Isn’t it?

  7. Kim says:

    I love the new header! So pretty!

  8. Jerri says:

    Gorgeous pics and a tremendous lesson that could not be more appropriate. Trying to work on a new project, I’ve spent the last hour with negative self-talk about my lack of tech skills. I came to your blog to give myself a brain break and found this.


  9. Jim says:

    Sweet post, trendy blog design and style, carry on the great work

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