Sometimes I feel so scared.
I wake in the night, feeling like life is just ticking away. So little time. At the theater the other night, I see an actor back flip through the air repeatedly and I know that is one thing I’m probably not going to experience this lifetime. What’s it like? Flying through the air with such freedom in your body?
I should have been a gymnast. Or a dancer. What would that have been like? Not a Black Swan miserable pain and suffering dancer…but…just….I don’t dance enough.
When I feel that frightening…time ticking away feeling, I have to remind myself we’re all eternal. What I don’t get to experience in this lifetime, I’ll get to experience in another one. Most of the world believes in reincarnation, btw. And there are many, many stories which lead me to believe it is true. We are but a beautiful bit of a much larger soul, which is part of a much larger ever expanding Universe.
Whatever I have done so far, is enough, even as I look forward to experiencing so much more of what this life has to offer.
One of the things that helps me when I feel scared is a set of questions from A Course in Miracles.
Where would You have me go?
What would You have me do?
What would You have me say and to whom?
This very blog post is a response to those questions. For me, just asking the questions and creating space to listen for answers takes away feelings of fear, helplessness or despair. Just honoring that I do have something of value to offer, no matter how small. One thing which also helps when I feel scared is listening to Rev. Michael Beckwith’s Living From the Overflow. Maybe it will help you too. I felt moved to mention it.