A Better Day

No phenols in 24 hours and an extra long soak in epsom salts and Riley is a new person today.

Happy. Playing. So engaged, dancing to Alvin & the Chipmonks in her room.

Not one tear. Not one scream today.    

Trying not to beat myself up for dropping the ball with the phenols. Trying not to cringe imagining certain people reading my last profanity laden post.  Not taking it down though because seriously, that’s what it’s like sometimes. I try to stay positive, but I’m only ever posting a mere fraction of our lives. Sometimes it is just a lot to deal with.

I finally went to bed at 5:30 AM and slept ’til 10:00AM. When I woke, Todd came up to greet me, hugged me. He’d read it,

“You got the poison out, huh?”

Yes. That’s exactly it.  

Spent the afternoon with Seth planning a mother/son overnight for next weekend. He is so excited. We really need some one on one. We’re going to an indoor water park. I wanted camping, but he got to pick. He promises me, “We’ll camp next time.”

Thanks so much for your kind comments and loving thoughts. Have a good weekend everyone.


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13 Responses to A Better Day

  1. Niksmom says:

    YAY!! And WHEW. 🙂 Glad things are on a more even keel now.

  2. danielle says:

    Glad the bath helped… hope you’re taking a nice deep breath and letting last night go… we all forget when things are going well how bad they can be. It’s jarring when there’s a backslide or mis-step. You’re being gentle with yourself, right?

  3. drama mama says:


    Michelle, please never write for other people. We love you just the way you are.


  4. Jess says:

    Great news. Sometimes it’s the simplest damn things. And hell, I’ve never even heard of a phenol!

  5. Kim says:

    Whoo-hoo for a better day! Have a great weekend.

  6. Wanda says:

    Ahh…relief. I hate it when I forget what I know and then remember and it makes all the difference. Happens all the time.

  7. Carrie Link says:

    Been off the grid for a few days (long story), and am so sorry I missed all that’s been happening with you and your family. NEHBM that you figured out what the problem was. Really. Brilliant. Nobody knows that girl like you do.

  8. pixiemama says:

    Nothing to regret there, babe. Nothing.


  9. Sally says:

    It might be a little cold for camping. 🙂

  10. goodfountain says:

    Glad things turned around for Riley and that you figured out the phenols. We figured out phenols might be a problem too because of the behavior after having a smoothie. A bowl of strawberries isn’t an issue, but a smoothie seems to send her right over the edge.

    I’m so sick of all this food stuff being an issue!!

    Oh, and on your other post – swearing is therapeutic for me. I don’t do it often, but when I just let loose I feel a little better.

    Here’s to hoping better days continue.

  11. Fellow 4-Paws mom here….. what’s a good source (preferably) on the internet for food/behavior stuff? Thanks for any help you can give! Blessings…

  12. amber says:

    Let go of your guilt, because it wasn’t even that bad anyway (the post, not the issue). This blog is YOUR place, and you write whatever the fuck you need to write. You are spending your life being an amazing, AMAZING mother to your kids, and if you need to blow off steam sometimes in order to keep your feet on the ground– thems the breaks for anyone who would be put off by it.

    IMO you are not manifesting this reality. (not that you asked, but whatever). This reality is part of your contract, because you are a brave soul who is willing to go through this fire with Riley’s soul in order to grow AS a soul. This fire is sacred. This fire– and every fire you walk through with this fucking disorder– is a kiln that is making you brilliant and beautiful and unique and strong.

    You shine.

    love 🙂

  13. Ang says:

    You give me strength when you write things like last night’s post. Thank you for your honesty. Be gentle with yourself.

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